Freetnin'
By Edwin Waugh, from ‘Tufts of Heather’ Waugh’s Complete Works, vol V. Printed in 1882 by John Heywood, Manchester.
From ‘Freetnin’’ (page 313).
This is very short, but so sweet it approaches perfection:
(Tummy opens the door of old Bill’s cottage. A crabbed old woman is seated on the hearth, smoking by candlelight.)
“Is Bill awhoam?”
“Nawe.”
“Where is he?”
“He’s gwon out.”
“Where’s he gwon to?”
“Somewheer where there’s ale to be had, I dar say.”
“Is Bill wife in?”
“Nawe; hoo’s gwon out.”
“Where’s hoo gwon to?”
“Hoo’s gwon a-seechin’ him; an’ if hoo lets on him it’ll be rough!”
“Con I leet my pipe at th’ fire?”
“Nawe, yo connot; for th’ fire’s gwon out, too. An’ you may goo out an’ o’, - as soon as yo’n a mind, - an’ shut that dur after yo!”